In all my experience i have never had a job that i have considered 'really hard' work. I left school with a handful of qualifications that even the most apathetic of students would scoff at. Nonetheless I have managed hotels, ran bars, trained staff, written, directed, produced and starred in low budget films, started a chilli sauce company all by myself, sold insurance (difficult and soul destroying), been a 'white van man' and produced live television shows. Which, incidentally is what i do now.
Work should never be that hard, it should just be something you enjoy. I have been fortunate enough to work a lot in the customer service industry, you know those people that serve you your food and drinks at various venues.
Now i know what you're thinking "You mean those dumb-witted half wits who either forget your order or come back with a plate of ravioli with grated cheese on top when you ordered the Steak. Well it's people like you that i enjoyed the most. It was my favourite hobby, being a bit of a body language aficionado, to spot the slightly more 'picky' types. Those people who particularly enjoyed mocking their server or looking down their noses on what they considered to be a simple job that was far, far beneath them. Especially when in parties of six or so i would enjoy seating them , making sure they were comfortable and took some drinks orders and told them the specials of the day while they were deciding what to order. I would then return at the appropriate time and then let them reel off their respective orders, how they would like them cooked, with sides, while i just stood there, cracking jokes and not writing a single one down. Also making sure i up-sold some extra onion rings or special sauces (It is a business after all).
It was always fun to hear the ring leader of the toffs or the tight-wad of the group make sure everyone knew that no-one could ever remember all of that (they were also usually the ones who threw in some curve balls to make sure you would fail). Sure when i first started doing this i missed the odd side, but sides are quick and easy to remedy. Soon enough i could bring out the whole order, beaming with confidence and put these snot-nosed morons in their place without uttering a word. As the old adage goes; actions speak louder than words.
One of the many reasons i think i did this was mainly because i can't stand going out for a pot of tea and clotted cream scones (or whatever your lunchtime poison is) and ordering just that only for the useless server, who could be a spotty school leaver, a single Mum/Dad, or a bitter octageneric (who for some reason is still working with boiling water and computerised tills) to completely forget to place your order or bring back a Latte and a ring donut.
I think I have a hatred for bad service because I love to serve. I don't know where this puts me in the 'snooty customer' scale but I always make sure my server knows they have done a good job, when they have good banter and add their own personal flair to the whole experience. It's a shame that tipping is not the 'norm' in England or we might get better people serving us.
So, people of Britain! Unite I say, feel the national pride permeate your being, make sure you frequent quality establishments. If the food isn't the best give it another go, they might have a hidden treasure on the menu that turns out to be the best Shepherds Pie in England. Step out of your comfort zone and order that obscure French dish that you can only pronounce in a loud voice which reminds you of the last time you asked for directions to the beach.
Last but not least, tip your server and try the veal!
